Last week’s blog was entitled, Self Correction is the Best Remedy for Change. I shared a practical step-by-step behavioral self assessment. This week, I challenge you to implement that strategy for change in your daily walk.
We take time to choose the best outfit that flatters our figure or matches our masculinity, in the case of males, when dressing for a particular event or appointment. There’s no room for flaws in our appearance because we want to turn heads or make a good impression. Ladies will get a full salon and spa service, and gentlemen will leave the barbershop razor sharp. But why don’t we shape our attitude before leaving the house?
No More Drama
We could eliminate so much drama if we took as much time to groom our attitude as we do our body. There would be less Waffle House fights, bar and club fights, party and picnic fights, and the like. Why get all dressed up just to lose your dignity and possibly the fight, when you could’ve just walked away? At least, that’s what a “mature” person would do. Hopefully, this doesn’t apply to most of you.
The following scenarios are only hypothetical…
Maturity Lesson 1: Mistakes happen and we all make them.
Let’s say you’re running errands or headed to the grocery store. You’re dressed down in your loungewear instead. You get hungry and decide to pull up to a drive-thru fast food restaurant. As you pull over to the side to check your order, you notice it’s incorrect or something is missing. You used the drive-thru to avoid getting out of the car, so you enter the restaurant heated. By the time you make it to the counter, you’re creating a scene by arguing with the cashier over a biscuit and some fries. Now, your calorie count and blood pressure are high.
Maturity Lesson 2: Your lack of planning is not an urgency on another’s part.
Let’s say you’re headed to work and running late. Because you’re running late and everyone’s supposed to know that, you expect traffic to move faster. Suddenly, everyone is going too slow for you. You’re moving from lane to lane without using blinkers and riding everyone’s tail in bumper-to-bumper traffic. While you’re making suicide moves, traffic isn’t moving any faster and you’re probably still going to be late. Meanwhile, the last car you jumped in front of is only two to three car lengths behind you. Now you’ve created unnecessary road rage out of impatience and rudeness, when you could’ve left earlier.
Maturity Lesson 3: If it’s not true, then there’s no need to defend yourself.
Suppose you receive a disturbing phone call in which you are falsely accused, and you snap. Or maybe someone in your family is spreading false rumors about you, and you confront him or her with hostility.
Disturbing phone calls and in-person confrontations can go all the way left because they usually trigger a slap, punch, expletives, or regretful words. Your aggression makes you look guilty of something indeed. Even if the accusation or rumor isn’t true, it becomes evident you are defensive and quick-tempered.
Maturity Lesson 4: Nip it in the bud or let it go.
Perhaps it is finally time to address a serious matter with a friend, family member, spouse, colleague, church member, neighbor, etc and because you let it fester, you have built up aggression. Needless to say, the argument doesn’t go so well.
However, when it’s time to approach someone about a serious matter, you at least have time to gather your thoughts and a possible solution. The unknown lies in how the other person responds. You can only control your own actions.
Crowned by Maturity
Whether you win or lose in a battle, you walk away with respect when exercising maturity. The person who pushed your button or tried to challenge you then looks foolish because you took away his or her power. Fools are fueled by reactions. When you pull that plug, their engine dies.
I’ve failed many tests by reacting unfavorably. I’ve even resigned from a good job in my early twenties and probably wouldn’t have been eligible for rehire at other jobs because of my attitude. I once reproached the Dean of Education in a defaming letter, based on rumors from a messy secretary. My attitude back then was, “This is just how I am, like it or not.”
I was never a bad person. I just sometimes had a bad attitude when I felt challenged. But once I learned how to adjust my attitude, adjusting my crown came with ease.
A crown represents the pinnacle of personal development. We can’t call ourselves kings and queens if we’re not behaving like them. Therefore, whether you are preparing to attend a ball or run errands, your best look is always maturity.
And remember…
“Make sense of what you do, and make every cent count.”
What are your thoughts? I’d love to hear them.
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Photo: Flickr. Maturity by Nikki Naughty
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